Friday, June 29, 2012

New Spell: Enhance Underpants

Le Spawn dit:

Enhance Underpants (Cleric 4)
Duration: Permanent or until dispelled; Range: Touch.

Enhance Underpants allows a cleric to bless a groinal undergarment (e.g., long johns, boxers, loincloths, furry barbarian speedos, chainmail panties, the diaper on the guy from White Plume Mountain) so that it offers magical protection when it is the primary article of clothing. Underpants thusly enhanced give a +3 to AC and act as a +2 ring of protection for the purposes of saving throws. If covered by other clothing, armor, etc., the PC receives no bonuses. Great for the barbarian loathe to part with traditional garb, and a boon to many Erol Otus subjects. Also comes in handy when a PC is captured by hostile forces, stripped to his or her skivvies, and chained up in a dungeon. Favored for romantic espionage operations, and situations where one's 'ass in left hanging in the breeze', as it were.


  1. You had me at furry barbarian speedos.

  2. I suppose if one were only wearing an apron it would work on that too.

  3. Awesome! This sort of reminds me of the "cock ring of protection" we had a while back in one of my games. That might have even been Carter's Ara LL game, now that I think about it. Does that ring any bells?

    1. I can't remember if that was in our game or maybe in your old Mutant Future game?

  4. @Carl: I believe we killed a red dragon somewhere along the way whose sole treasure was a cock-ring worth 75gp ... but it does seem like there was something else about a cock-ring of protection.

  5. I must be getting my bonuses right now.

  6. @Tim: Be advised the spell provides no bonuses to save against electrical storms. Keep it indoors.