I'm not a fan of St. Patrick as a historical figure, and I'm not much of a fan of St. Patrick's Day in the US as it's practiced. To me it's like Columbus Day for Native Americans. I think the peoples of Ireland could have done just as well without the Christianity, thank you very much (or better said, they could hardly have done worse). But aside from my ideological issues, I ask: Why does anyone need a calendrical excuse to get totally shit-faced drunk? Why do you wait for the sanctioned day to lose your shit completely? How free are you if you get drunk when local Eyewitness News tells you to? And do you think that's what happens in Ireland on St. Patrick's Day?
St. Ainless of Inocks, Patron Saint of Metal Accoutrements